When I was young, there seemed to be endless possibilities. Even though my world was very small, I had high hopes of big experiences; travel, visiting big cities and historical spots; becoming a veterinarian, or a nurse or a teacher. I think many children could have related!  Then I grew up, and despite my best efforts, the dreams I held dear didn’t exactly come true.  

Relationships failed, jobs changed, finances were unpredictable—chronic illness and injury struck without warning. And of course, suffering the loss of those dear to me in death proved to be the most life altering.  I grew up fast. 

My story isn’t unique-things haven’t panned out the way I  hoped they would. 

Life has kicked the breath out of my body, and I  feel beaten down. 

What else can I do, but yield? 

But now…

Now it’s time to get up, wash my tear-stained face, and keep moving forward. 

Adjusting to these unwanted changes can be overwhelming. It is hard for me to believe that there can be any fulfillment or joy in the void left by what was lost, the dreams and hopes that have been torn from us. 

But we are more adaptable than we often give ourselves credit for.  There are some steps that help us embrace that unexpected life a little more easily:

**redefine success/what real growth is

**make the most of every good experience and enjoy life and the people in it 

**be ok with/grieve the life that didn’t pan out

**do not play the comparison game 

Getting everything we want doesn’t guarantee happiness, after all. What does help us deal with the disappointment when life doesn’t pan out as we hoped, is HOW we handle the disappoints and suffering. 

This YouTube podcast came up on my feed recently.  As a widower, Jack shares his story of how his life didn’t go as he exactly planned, but has still been one of fulfillment and meaning.